The Plague

Guten morgen. I am chewing gum not laced with nicotine-- only with copious amounts of sugar-- a sort of placebo experiment.  Simeon is at work for a bit, cycling around in my head like a hamster on a wheel-- no, that is not right-- like that guy jogging around in the space station in the film, '2001-- A Space Odyssey'. The hamster is subjected to gravity, and remains at the bottom of his wheel, but Simeon cycles around in my head in big circles, upside down once per revolution, independent of centrifugal force. He has no sense of being upside down though-- he feels like a hamster on a wheel. But there is no gravity in my head, you see, so what he feels is an illusion.

Meanwhile, alas, I remain unemployed. I shall not be making my mark in the world in the plastics industry.

I was denied a work permit, as I would be "taking a job away from a German."

Sigh.

This is an interesting theory, but the employment agency had called to know if I could start work immediately, no interview or knowledge of the German language required. The factory had obviously been desperate for workers. The natives had apparently not been very eager to do menial, repetitive shift work at 7 euros an hour.

Yet the law is there, to appease the masses who believe foreigners are stealing their jobs.

I don't think such a law exists even in the xenophobic capital of the world, Arizona, where the locals patrol the border with their 30-30's to keep Pancho Villa on his side of the border-- even though it is the gringos who are in what was once Mexico.

When the USA conquered Mexico, and stole places like Arizona from the Mexicans, we gave back most of what we had conquered because the land was full of Mexicans, and the USA only wanted the land, and not the Mexicans that came with the land. As Arizona hadn't had many Mexicans in it, we kept it. There were only the Indians to deal with then. I think the USA should give Arizona back to Mexico, but Mexico might refuse the offer because it is full of gringos. Or, better yet, the USA should give Arizona back to the guys who were there first. Or, better yet, erase the border, and there will be no patrolling yahoo's with 30-30's, and no 'illegals' climbing that ridiculous wall-- there will be no wall or fence-- no Arizona anymore, just a place on the Earth where people live. But let that region without name or borders be governed by descendants of the original inhabitants.

Yes, if I were the dictator of the universe, this would be my Proclamation.

But, I digress.

Back to the job situation in Germany.

Though the job in the plastics factory would only have paid 7 euros an hour, and only for 100 hours a month, and though this is considered near poverty for the locals who do not want the job, (but also don't want foreigners to have the job) the fact is that I would have been a wealthy man had I gotten the job. I would have made 8400 euros a year.

According to Global Rich List ( http://www.globalrichlist.com/ ) that would have put me in the top 16% richest people in the world by income.

Even when I was on the road, living on 150 euros a month in donations, I was a middle-class man, being in the top 38% richest people in the world by income.

I would have liked making 8400 euros a year, and being wealthy. I might have donated 20 euros a month to help Syrian refugees. That would have been 240 euros a year, theoretically elevating my benefactor-- I say benefactor because that person would be helping me-- yes, altruism is selfish-- my benefactor would be elevated to being in the top 55% richest people in the world by income. Of course, my theoretical benefactor would still be homeless, having fled the war, and would still be missing family members, and would still be traumatized. But the 240 euros a year would amount to something-- a chance to survive. And the amount I would lose by helping out a homeless victim of a war would have dropped my standing on the Global Rich List by only a fraction. I would still have been in the top 16% richest people in the world by income.

Meanwhile, I can't complain-- I am wealthy anyway, living in a warm home and eating lots of food thanks to the love of Elke. But I would have liked having the ability to help pay the bills here and being able to help others to survive. What a privilege that would have been.

"Taking a job away from a German"... "Taking a job away from an American"...
What a load of shite.

Just to remind the reader, from the Urban Dictionary:

1. shite

a very british and therefore great way of saying shit. shite sounds much more effective than shit

'karen looks like five kinds of shite today'

2. Shite

Just like shit, but more fun to say.

This Urban Dictionary is also a bit nationalistic, equating 'British' with 'Great', when there are some things British that are shite, but perhaps I am splitting hairs now.

Anyway, this nationalism-- this exclusive shite, based on neither merit nor love, but simply on where a person was born-- this nationalism is a plague on the Earth. Is religion really the cause of all strife on earth? It is, yes! But it is the religion of false gods that is the cause of all strife on earth-- the Money god, the State god, the Bible/Qu'ran/Torah god, the Flag god...

Fellow Americans, I can assure you that I would never burn the American flag. What's the point? But I will never again fly it from a flagpole or salute it. If I had an American flag today, I might use it as a doormat-- not out of any intended disrespect, but because it would serve some purpose then. Or if I had a sewing machine I might make it into a pillow. And be assured, those of you fellow Yanks who are offended by this... I would do the same with any flag of any nation. 

My flag is the laundry that I hang on the rare occasion that I do the laundry. I will salute my hanging laundry, or bow to it maybe, instead. 

If I were the dictator of the universe, I would do away with flags on flagpoles. And with borders. And every time some group of nationalists tried to make another border I would have it erased. I'd let the nationalists run around preaching their idolatry but I would employ members of the Hare Krishna sect to follow them around all day chanting love and throwing flower petals at them. I would have the Hare Krishna trained in the tactics of Ho Chi Minh, or Mao, or whoever it was, to advance when the nationalists retreat, and retreat when the nationalists advance. The nationalists would advance on a carpet of flower petals, amidst a barrage of chanting, and they would retreat on a carpet of flower petals, amidst a barrage of chanting.

If I were the dictator of the universe, I wouldn't do away with governments, though. I would do away with a military, and with all weapons, which would be turned into plowshares, basically.

Ex-military personnel would be trained in farming, and given a hoe, which they would have to learn to disassemble and then assemble again blindfolded in 60 seconds or else they would be punished by having to sit in a hot bathtub while being read poetry and listening to Sufi music. Military personnel who could not adapt to the rigorous life of farming would be sent to the Hare Krishna Corps.

Ex-Special Forces would be trained in becoming self-sufficient Peace Pilgrims, crossing deserts and frozen wastelands on foot, living off the generosity of locals, begging for food and clothing and shelter-- not stealing it-- Being Peace, and toting wooden peace staffs instead of M4 rifles with SOPMOD 2 package, which includes the EO Tech 553 holographic reflex site, LA-5 infrared laser, foregrip, the M3X visible bright light (tactical light) and associated accessories. All of that crap would become plowshares. Their mission-- the ex-Special Forces guys-- would be more of a challenge than any candy-assed government-funded military mission they ever had, with helicopters and shite like that-- they would have the task of wandering the Earth without any government funding at all, and to do it until peace prevails. Those ex-Special Forces guys who wash out-- and many of them would, I'm afraid-- the mission would last for the rest of their lives, and there would be little glory in it-- those who can't cut it would be sent to agricultural school, and if they wash out there, to the Hare Krishna Corps, and if they wash out there, to a New Age Commune. Those who wash out of everything would be given a paycheck to survive on anyway, and given a big hug when they pick up their paycheck.

No, if I were dictator of the universe, I would let governments continue, so long as they kept themselves busy with helping their sisters and brothers-- ie, anyone living in or wandering into their districts. And the function of government would be Harmony. If a guy from Arizona, for example,  refuses to pay taxes for schools and hospitals, then that's okay. He can even still send his kids to the schools, and go to the hospital when he gets sick, as long as laborers from Mexico are willing to pay the taxes to keep these institutions going.